Talking to your child about boundaries in BJJ

Brazilian Jiu Jitsu is a physical sport, and children often trust their coaches deeply. Helping your child understand healthy boundaries can empower them without making training feel scary.

Here are some simple, age-appropriate ways to approach the conversation:

1. Normalise speaking up
Let your child know they can always talk to you if something feels confusing, uncomfortable, or wrong — even if they’re not sure why.

2. Explain appropriate touch
You might say:

“In jiu jitsu, coaches may need to correct positions, but they should always explain what they’re doing and stop if you feel uncomfortable.”

3. Reinforce choice and consent
Help your child understand that:

• They are allowed to say no

• They can ask for help from another adult

• They won’t get in trouble for speaking up

4. Talk about secrets
Make it clear that adults should never ask children to keep secrets about training, messages, or behaviour.

5. Keep communication open
Simple check-ins like:

• “How did training feel today?”

• “Was there anything that made you uncomfortable?”
  can make a big difference over time.

6. Trust your instincts — and theirs
If your child’s behaviour changes, or something doesn’t sit right with you, it’s okay to ask questions or raise concerns early.

Safeguarding works best when children feel supported, parents feel informed, and coaches feel accountable.